Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Don't be Afraid To Be You



This Is Me, Kierra Sheard

Open Season

Open Season

Daniel 2:21 And he changeth the times and the seasons: he removeth kings, and setteth up kings: he giveth wisdom unto the wise, and knowledge to them that know understanding: KJV


Some of you need to ask God for a season. Not a season that falls in the box, like summer(more money), winter(a relationship), spring (better job), or fall(peace).


You need to ask God for a season….time….like a leave of absence you need to take time to do something or get some things done. For some you may need a season to just breathe. You have been tasked with so much that you have not had an opportunity to anything. For someone else you may need a season of restoration. Your spirit, heart, and mind have been chipped away piece by piece until there is a significant ruin in you. Another may need a season to be free from running. You have been running so long you almost feel guilty when you stop to rest. Others may need a season to date, eat, work with worry, enjoy your family without distraction, to be in love, to have fun, to be drama free ………whatever you need a season to do…WHATEVER, nothing is too big, or too small, or outside the box. Whatever you need time to do, God is granting requests. He is saying, “ask me. See won’t I do it.”


To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven (Ecclesiastes 3:1,KJV). Everything…yes everything. Even that thing you dare not ask God for, there is a season for it. Every by definition means – all possible; the greatest possible degree of (Random House Unabridged Dictionary). Whatever is possible, to the greatest possible degree, God is willing to grant you a season for it. So ask. Do not be afraid or surprised when he does it.


Seasons last for a set time. Some seasons are literal, 3 months. Some seasons are for years. Other seasons are for a dispensation of time. Know that while you are in your season, God is going to cover you. Whatever has to be done, he will take care of it. And whatever you mess up trying to figure out what to do in your season, God will cover you. Like time off from work, coverage will be provided to take care of your duties. And like a blanket laid over a work area, He is going to cover you in this season. Be specific because God is going to give you your season. Season’s Greetings for whatever season you’re walking in!

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Time To Cancel That Contract

Time To Cancel That Contract



Isaiah 44:2 …the LORD that made thee, and formed thee from the womb, [which] will help thee….


There are people, places, groups and/or entities that have laid false claims on YOU. They have taken credit for you, your time, your talent, your gifts, your finances, your emotions, your spirit and even your intellectual property. You entered into a contract, either verbally (by committing yourself to that person, place, or thing), by deed (doing something that implied a greater commitment), or by physical contract (documentation). Though you entered into that contract/agreement/relationship willingly, what you did not understand was that, like a bad artist contract, that deal was not set up to benefit you. It was set up to benefit the other party. After your introductory time was up, the real costs and terms were revealed. And you paid for a little thing four times over because of the interest tagged on to you. So you have been pimped to perform on demand so that they can profit or benefit. For some of you the physical timeline has run out, but by a false sense of obligation you were guilt tripped or coerced into another term. Like a cell phone contract, because you needed something you had to re-commit yourself to another two year contract.


I wanted to announce that God is giving you permission to cancel those contracts. Whatever the cancellation fees are, whatever has not been paid up, whatever still needs to be produced, God said, I will pay for it, I will take care of it. If you will be bold enough to believe, you can tell your debtors listen, I know you feel I owe you, and in many way I may do, but my God is going to have to satisfy that debt. Like a new owner taking over a business, direct all outstanding items to the owners.


God made you. He formed you. Even the very hairs on your head, he knows them. No one will be able to take claim over you. Nothing will be able to boast that they made you. Every gift, trick, niche, tease, good thing, and bad thing God made. A seed he planted in you before you were born. You owe no one anything but the love of Christ. Be free, like the metro PCS commercial, “say goodbye to contracts”…….Hello! Permission to LIVE freely!

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Adam Lives In Theory, Lauryn Hill



Adam Lives In Theory, Lauryn Hill

When I Was A Child

When I Was A Child….



1 Corinthians 13:11 When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

Everyone has a “when I was a child” story, especially when they reminisce of discipline and respect towards parents and adults. When we were younger, we got immediate consequences for our ill actions. Whether it was a spank, a scold, or mouth cleansing for dirty words, we were immediately castigated for inappropriate behavior. As we got older the punishments were further apart; partly because we learned from previous actions and consequences which behaviors to avoid and how to conduct ourselves in a better manner.

The recent Tiger Woods scandal was a shocker for some. Tiger was considered and upstanding all around “good guy” and great sportsman. His “personal” one on one interviews all echoed the same story, a great athlete and family man. So when the scandal was uncovered and the strange array of women came out of the woodworks, it was a bombshell and insult to the “good guy” and great sportsman image. Even he was overwhelmed, not necessarily at the actions but at the exposure. The attention made it obvious that the behavior was wrong, but at the moments he participated in the actions there was no sense of guilt or move to correct the behavior. Why? Because there was no immediate consequence for his actions. So over time no repercussion gave the illusion that there is no harm or wrong being done.

How many people fall into this trap? Since you are no longer immediately chastised for wrongdoing it assumed, “no harm, no foul”. Look at the world of business, the banking and real estate industry for example. When some of those CEOs were mere brokers and tellers, they had to follow the rules or suffer the consequences. A teller comes up short on their drawer they will be terminated and could suffer imprisonment depending on the severity of the loss. As those tellers climb up the corporate ladder and made it to the executive chair, they laxed in their practices of integrity because there are fewer arms to invoke consequences. The end result? A Nation’s economic system severely abated and no one is imprisoned, or even brought to a public trial to explain their actions or omission.

The purpose of allowing a person, business, or CEO the ability to act freely with fewer consequences is not to allow him/her/it to do more unjust behavior. The hope is that we put away childish things (behavior that requires governing and immediate chastisement) and become mature. Understanding that no one should have to say “Tiger, don’t cheat on your wife”; “Business don’t lie about your profits” ; “Mortgage Broker don’t lie about their income”; “Bank CEO don’t get a raise when you just fired 2,000 employees”; “Preacher don’t steal”; “Hey you, stop sleeping with little girls!”. I mean really do we have to?

Let’s not force a hand that begins immediate consequences for doing the wrong thing. Mature and do the right thing, at the right time, for the right reason.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Come Back To The Middle, India Arie

False Burden Of Perfection (Continued)

False Burden of Perfection (Continued)


The burden is not just a relationship issue or a woman’s issue, it’s a people issue. There are men who work just as hard to get the trophy wife, family, and life. The image that they must make a million dollars to get a nice looking wife, have 2.5 or more kids, have a title, any title that represents power, and drive the top brand car. Anything less means they are less. Ego tripping as a conversation to prove to the next man that, “my toy is better than yours.” It’s as if a man can’t have the “regular” he has to have the “super sized combo.”


He makes constant decisions and actions based on trying to fill this self imposed burden because the Camry is not good enough it has to be a Mercedes. The wife who’s a teacher and great cook is not good enough she has to be a supermodel with extraneous bedroom abilities, or some woman with a “power title.” The house with nice backyard and enough to have a guest room is not enough, it has to be a two story mini mansion with far more rooms than people. The kid who makes good grades isn’t good enough he has to be the athletic star in a professional sports league to be “your boy.”


Not just in family, but in career, amongst friends, and in life. No one said you had to be perfect you assumed that is what it takes, to get acceptance, friends, and love. At the end of the day that is what we are really looking for. An embrace. That embrace can be physical like a hug, or kiss, or sex. Or it can be symbolic like a patch or proof that you are a part of a group. And Affirmation. That social pat on the back that you’ve done good.


You ask the average person, “are you happy where they are in life?” Overwhelmingly the majority will say, NO. Why? Because they want more or something else. What they have isn’t good enough or it isn’t enough. Most American debt is acquired trying to get things to prove “I AM SUCCESSFUL.” See my car, see my house, see my clothes, see my toys. See See. Meanwhile their paychecks are spent before they are deposited, they can’t keep regularly scheduled maintenance on the car, foreclosure is eminent, and they can no longer send those Dry Clean Only clothes to the cleaners. They are married and obligated to the stuff. Now depression creeps on along with frustration. Homes are broken, trust and self respect is breached, and so is the law in an attempt to maintain this false burden of, “I have to have.”


Not just women, not just men. But everyone does it. Teen girls are under the false impression that I have to be a size XS with big busts and a butt, in order to get “love”– attention. They feel obligated to be sexually promiscuous with hair down their back, wearing skinny jeans, stilettos, eye lashes and make up to be “pretty.” I wonder where did they get that idea from? (models, magazines, “Reality” TV shows, videos, news, MOM). Teen boys don’t sing and rap about going to school and getting a job, they are just programmed to “get money.” Doesn’t matter where it comes from, how it comes, or what they do to get it. Just get it and spend it, and buy what you want – women, cars, friends, love.


Imagine what kind of fulfilled life we could really have if we stopped trying to fulfill this false burden of perfection and actually seized and enjoyed what good things are already there and within our grasp. Drink from your own cistern (Proverbs 5:15). Enjoy yourself, your life, and the things and people in it.

False Burden of Perfection

False Burden of Perfection


I have noticed many women have been carrying an unnecessary burden. It’s a self inflicted and self imposed burden to be “perfect.” And it’s not the traditional understanding or definition of perfection. It’s a skewed and surreal method of reinvention at the request of various people at various stages. It’s not the same as people pleasing a little similar but more damaging because with each failure or shortcoming strips a piece of the mental, physical, social, and familial stability.


I see it happen over and over again with women for men. He says, “I want a woman who is going somewhere.” So she goes to school, joins a social club, works hard for a promotion, etc. Then he cheats with a chick who stays home all day and doesn’t work or does some menial work and you’re confused like, “why her?” That experience gets filed, so the next man comes along you quit the social groups, clock out on time, and stop hanging with the girls and he starts spending time with a chick who is a Director, President of the League, and has a non-profit. Go Figure! Then reinvention happens again because maybe this guy was better than the last guy and it is assumed that “this guy” is the guy I really want or should have because he does this or that. Then we become frustrated perfecting each area from previous experiences or the experiences of our friends and secretly trade for love for lust. “if I can’t get ‘Love’ I’ll settle for lust.”Some attention is better than none. And the guys you want, you know what they want so you exchange that for affection, attention, and whatever else he is willing to give up.


So various experiences, conversations, and images form our ideas of what we “have to be” to be happy. And our happiness is limited to who we are in a relationship with. Man or woman we allow expectations and demands to be placed on us…..Gotta be model thin, gotta have to have long hair, gotta be dressed a certain way, gotta look a certain way, gotta be down to have any kind of sex, gotta be strong, gotta go with me everywhere I go, gotta cook, gotta work, gotta pay for it ….STOP!


It’s almost amusing to hear women sit around each other and say what has to be done to have a man or keep a man home. And the responsibility is almost always left on the woman to do something. We forget that any kind of relationship be it boyfriend, husband, friends, or siblings require TWO people. Which means you could be everything you need to be, but if the other person is lacking it will still come up short. I recall a male friend of mine saying to me, “1+1 has to equal 2. If you are not getting 2 something is wrong with ‘the one’”.


What you respect is what you attract, and where you sow is where you’ll reap. If you spend your energy on your looks, and bedroom activities, then you’ll attract a man that wants that. And he will only come for what was advertised especially if you keep giving free samples just for stopping by and taking a look.


Stop rearranging yourself to appear as the perfect candidate. Do you even know what you are signing up for. It’s like competing to win and you have no idea what the prize is, you just want to be the winner. So you train hard and work hard to compete and your prize is only a snack pack! Be the person you enjoy seeing and being around. If you like nails wear them, if you don’t, DON’T. If you don’t have butt don’t get one installed, enjoy whatever tissue God gave you. Be true to you and be at peace with yourself, stop trying to live up to these imaginary standards. Truth is the people you are reinventing yourself for, is hoping they could find perfection in you because they too are lacking confused and often IMPOSTERS. They are stuck in fantasyland and expect you to make it their reality.